Controlling Emotions After Drug Rehab

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23:7

You survived your stay in a drug rehab and are excited to be out. Now comes the hard work! I have seen too many people relapse within the first couple of weeks after getting out of rehab because they don’t know how to handle their emotions.

Before I delve into how to control your emotions, I need you to think about your answers to the following questions. They all provide fuel to be able to control your emotions and therefore not relapse.

• Did they teach you how to control your emotions when in rehab?
• Did you address your deep, underlying issues that bring up the negative emotions that you used your drug to escape from?
• Did you identify what (or who) triggers you to get angry or mad and then use? And did they show you a different way to respond?
• Did they teach you how to forgive those who hurt you?
• Did you learn how to take 100% responsibility for your life from this point forward?
• Did they show you how to allow God to help you in your daily walk to stay clean?
• Do you have a vision for an awesome future–or is your goal “not” to do drugs?
• Do you feel equipped to handle anything? Yes, you DO have power to change your life!

A lot of our beliefs play into our emotional state. We tend to have self-talk around what we believe we can or cannot do. Here are a few examples:

• I can’t handle this
• I can’t help myself, that’s just the way I am
• I can never forgive that person for what they did (or didn’t do) to me
• I can’t forgive myself
• I have a tendency to relapse, I guess that’s just the way I am
• I am what I am, I cannot change
• Why try when I know I will relapse again?

Today I will address our thought life and how it needs to be controlled in order to control our emotions.

You may have all kinds of thoughts of fear of relapse, can you really stay clean this time, what will others think of you, how can I prove to myself and others that I am really ready to change?

Our thoughts come from our beliefs. Our beliefs come from growing up, life experiences, influence of others, and our own stinking thinking. These thoughts provide pictures in our mind.

We need to change the pictures we create by our thoughts and words. Your mind goes to where the pictures take you.

If you think “I don’t want to do my addiction,” the picture of your addiction pops up. The goal is to find a better story to focus on. Stories that include:

• This is what I want my future to look like – see it, feel the emotions of accomplishing it
• When I get triggered, I have a new, empowering way to respond – see yourself responding differently and calmly, walking away from the situation, telling people you don’t want to discuss that.
• I need not fear because God is with me and guiding me
• I do have power to change my life and when I operate in that power, this is what I will do (list the actions).

The goal is, once the underlying issues have been identified and dealt with as to why you use drugs or alcohol, to stop associating with your former habit of being an addict … and stop hanging around other people in recovery who only focus on their recovery (unless you are court-ordered to do certain programs).

Here is how the normal recovery process keeps a person in bondage. If I tell you not to think about a green frog … what just popped into your mind? Yup, a green frog. Imagine that green frog as your “addiction.” The goal is to stop thinking about a green frog (your addiction). You attend weekly (or daily) support groups that talk about the green frog. You get a sponsor to help you stop thinking about the green frog. You call your sponsor to talk about how you can’t stop thinking about the green frog. But you can’t.

The only way to stop thinking about the green frog is to replace it with a bigger and better picture of your future. God’s way of doing that is for us to use our passion in life to reach out to love and serve others.

But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides. Matthew 6:33

I used to think that the above verse was only talking about seeking my relationship with God and deepening it. But it says to seek His kingdom. This is a way of life … and one that will satisfy the deepest longings inside us for love and connection.

You don’t have to spend the rest of your life in recovery groups. But, yes, you do need to be in groups where you can connect with like-minded people. Check to see if your church has small groups you can attend.